So many people have felt the sharp pain of loneliness at one point or another during their life, but especially in our current Covid culture. Isolation, social distancing, and not seeing people smile can cause extreme psychological effects, increasing our loneliness and feelings of angst. If you feel lonely, you are not alone.
Studies show that more than three in five Americans are lonely. With more and more people reporting feeling like they are left out, poorly understood, and lacking companionship, loneliness is on the rise.
Arriving at Loneliness
You may be lonely because you feel disconnected from people and lack meaningful, supportive relationships. In my life-coaching practice and research for my books, I’ve learned that most of us are lonely because we don’t feel understood, seen, or acknowledged for who we really are. When that goes on too long, it can lead to feelings of sadness and rejection, which can stop you from reaching out to others.
The fact is, human beings need each other. Human connection, touch, hugs, smiles, and togetherness are part of what fulfills us. As pack animals, we are not designed to be alone or isolated. Instead, we need community, companionship, and support to thrive.
[Read: “3 New Ways to Battle Loneliness, Connect With Others, and Live to Be 100.”]
Plus, our ability to overcome challenges is one of our greatest assets as human beings. We are resilient and hopeful. Learning how to see the silver lining of our current time can help save us from mental angst. It is clear to me that we must lean into each other instead of pulling away. We need each other, now more than ever.
Reach out to loved ones, check on the friend who always checks on you, give yourself permission to feel what you need to feel, and don’t be afraid to reach out to someone to let them know you are hurting.
Loneliness can happen with a lack of company but there are many times where we can be surrounded by people, or in a relationship and still feel lonely. But being alone isn’t always a bad thing because aloneness (or solitude) will often help us figure out who we are and what we need.
Isolation can be a spiritual experience if we allow for it. The goal is to be able to be alone but not lonely. When you can enjoy your own company and be one with yourself, you can feel peace from within.
Affirmations to Refocus & Connect
Using affirmations is a powerful way to refocus your energy away from what does not feel good and align back to the truth, which is that you are loved and cared for always. These affirmations from my book Find Your Happy Daily Mantras can help.
- I may be alone, but I don’t have to be lonely.
- I am not damaged or wounded.
- There is nothing wrong with me.
- I am hurting and that is okay. I feel what needs to be felt.
- My loneliness is not an invitation to settle.
- I am kind to myself and give myself what I need as I need it.
- I am doing the best I can.
- I am never alone, for I am always surrounded by love.
- I am comfortable in the silence.
- I disengage from all harmful activities.
- I am patient with myself.
There’s no one-size-fits-all solution to the problem of loneliness. The good news is, you are not alone. Many people feel this way, and reaching out to extend a helping hand or share your own feelings is a great way to bridge the gap between feeling lonely and disconnected and connecting
in purposeful and meaningful ways.